The Post with my Weekend
So last week I was under a perfect storm of events. I was pretty busy at work and I was feeling kind of lazy about writing- that led to only one update all week last week between both blogs. That is a sheer level of sucktitude previously unheard of. I'll be better this week as I actually have a couple days worth of stuff to right about. There is trophy seeing, some bar stories for the dating blog, and a Super Bowl prediction as we see if I can continue my record of futility that I am currently sitting comfortably at.

But as always we start Monday off with the weekend recap.

Friday night I left work and headed into the gym to get a workout in for the weekend. Friday nights are still a pretty good night to get into the gym but it's been fuller as of late which kind of sucks. They started doing a new class that meets on Driday nights so people are in there and they bring in people. What is kind of surprising- but not really I suppose if you consider the circumstances- is they have not really had the post New Year membership bump. I thought maybe they should've done more to lower start-up fees or something to get people in. They really didn't and there are not nearly as many new people in there like normal. Economy is hitting everything.

Went home than and got a shower and watched some TV before heading out to Red Hills for 90's night. Much different crowd for 90's night. There are a few older people but much less so than on 80's night. Also, many more younger people showed up for this. Quite a few interesting stories going on. Well maybe not interesting, but they are certainly little short stories that go on around you all night long if you choose to pay attention to them. Too foten I pay attention to them and it distracts me from my goal. Or maybe I let it distract me from my goal. Whatever- either way. At least one of the stories will hit up in the blog because I find it to be interesting enough to stretch into an advice article. However, the other one can get thrown in here.

There's a person who goes into Red Hills a lot. Either she's just there everytime I go in or she is just there. I'm assuming the latter. She basically gives off the impression of being the Bar Bicycle. And it's funny to me to watch guys get sucked into her all the time. For sake of discussion- she has a decent body but a below average face. Her weapon of choice is her dancing and it works. I saw her suck 4 guys into her pull Friday night. I think I've seen her in there before with a boyfriend of some kind but more often than not it's her and her 1-3 ugly friends (prototypical 6 or 7 who surrounds herself with 2's, so she looks like a 9). Further proof to me that guys are easy marks. Or maybe I'm jealous because I'm standing next to the "1 hour wait from this point in line," sign. Who knows?

After the bar I headed to Wal-Mart to get my shopping in for the weekend. Got to tell you, I know there are jokes made about who shops at Wal-Mart after midnight, but it is much nicer than going at 11:30 on a Saturday morning. There is no one there. The only thing you need to fight around are the skids of product out so they can re-stock shelves. Seriously, in and out in 15 minutes. You can just beeline around the store gettign what you want and not having to worry about battling crowds.

Got to bed around 3 and slept until about 8:30 Saturday morning. Got up and did some little things around the house.

After lunch I headed down to the outlets near Limerick to go to the Under Armour store. I had a 50 dollar gift card to use from Christmas and I needed some cold weather gear to wear outside for jogging. I ended up buying a long sleeve compression shirt and long johns along with a light long sleeve T. That was 85 but it only cost me 35 with the gift card. It was nice.

First time I've ever walked through those outlets and it is an interesting place. The thing that sucks is you can't go from store to store without walking back outside everytime. Also the people there are just as annoying as any other store. I walked into 4 stores and at every store I was 3 steps in and someone was asking if they could help me. By the time I got to the Sony store I just said to the guy, "I don't even know what I'm looking for just yet." He just gave me a weird look and said to find him if I needed something. Won't do.

After that I headed over to the Carmike Cinema in Pottstown. I had a free ticket to use there which expired at the end of January. I hate going to that theater anymore because you can't get there on a Friday or Saturday night and not be surrounded by stupid junior high/ high school kids. Theater was pretty full for a Saturday afternoon. I guess with the heat people were trying to get out- to stay in. No idea. I saw My Bloody Valentine again, but this time in 3D. It definitely changes the perception of the film. It's a little more intense and the RealD 3D is a neat experience if not a little busy. Went home after that and ate dinner.

Watched some stuff and caught up on Damages which I'm infinitely more interested in for the second season than I was the first. The storyline seems much tighter and is moving quicker towards the goal. Plus the mystery of who she is holding hostage intrigues me more for some reason.

Got up Sunday morning and went into Sunday School to do my teaching thing. We had a good class again. Good group of kids. I think I enjoy this mix more than any I've had so far. After that I headed home to mill around the house and get some more things done.

I just about have all my tapes shipped over to DVD. That means about 3 trash bags full of tapes will be finding themselves a home somewhere other than in my room.

I watched a few other things including the season premiere of Big Love which was pretty good.

After that I went to meet a friend for dinner down in Doylestown. I figured then that I was halfway to my buddy's place in Newtown so I went down there for the WWE Royal Rumble pay per view. He has a group of 10-11 people who get together every month for it and it's kind of cool. Pretty decent show too as everything moved along pretty well and was very nicely paced. The Rumble is always fun to watch as well.

The highlight though was the pool. They do a pool for every PPV with a 5 dollar buy in. With 12 people there last night that meant 60 dollars was up for grabs. It came down to the wire with mystery entry guesses but I won the Rumble pool by 5 points over his buddy Sean. So I have paid my phone bill for the next two months. SWEET!!

Jumped on the turnpike then and zoomed home getting to my house in 1 hour and 7 minutes flat. That may or may not be a record. I seem to think I've gotten home from there in 1 hour and 5 minutes before but I can't recall. So 1 hour and 7 minutes is the new unofficial record.

And now, here I am bored and heading to lunch. Hooray for me
- posted by Brian @ 1/26/2009 10:31:00 AM

 
The Post with my weekend
Weekend recap- straight ahead.

Friday I rolled out of work and was super excited. I'm at the point right now where I really dislike my job. They have just made it incredibly more difficult to be good at this job. Maybe it's their intent- I don't know.

So anyway, I headed back to Quakertown to get in my movie night. First I had to stop in at Kohl's because I needed new sneakers for at the gym. My old ones have reached a point where they are kind of wearing funny so there is not enough arch support. And you need arch support!!! So I got a decent pair of kicks for a pretty good price. Also picked up a new candle since mine is almost burnt out. It's part of my energy conservation initiative. Burn candles and save electricity. I'm so forward thinking.

After that I headed over to the movies and got my tickets to see My Bloody Valentine. Unfortunately the theater only had the 2D version and the movie was just good enough that now I need to see it in 3D. Had the movie sucked I could've avoided the 3D version. They changed the ending from the original but I think it probably works a little better. They did do something different with the laundromat kill though. That was the coolest part of the original. You know as a horror fan I kind of detest the constant stream of remakes that come out. However, it does mean they re-release the originals on DVD. So it's a double edged sword.

After that I jumped over to Gran Torino which was terrific. Just a great movie. It was quite a bit fuller than I expected for a 10 pm showing. Especially with a movie that skewers older. There were two full rows of people who were probably in their 50's to watch the film. I'll say this about the movie- the racist stuff might make you uncomfortable. You could hear people laughing hysterically at some of the stuff and you could see others bristling at it. I'll say this- you've never heard so many terms for Vietamense, Chinese, and Japanese people in your life. at some point it gets hard to keep up. Headed home after that in the frigid cold. I've never felt it as cold as it felt Friday night. Just disgusting.

Saturday morning I got up and went to the gym. You could tell the cold was keeping people in becasue it was not near as full as it normally would be on a Saturday morning. Got in about an hour and then headed over to Wal-Mart to pick up my groceries for the week.

Came home after that and ate lunch. I kind of had a bad head cold (have for a few days) so I just kind of laid around and did nothing all day except watch TV, and take cold medicene. I did catch up on the first couple episodes of Damages for Season 2. I had lost interest in the show towards the end of season 1 but it drew me back in by the end. I already like the second season more than the first couple episodes of last season.

I watched the movie The Specials that a friend of mine let me borrorw. It was ok. I was expecting something a little funnier so the overly dramatic tone of it all kind of took me by surprise. After that I popped in Season 5 of Newsradio and watched a bunch of episodes of that. That show was ahead of its time. It was 30 Rock before 30 Rock. Plus it had a great cast. You have to check it out on Netflix or something. Or buy the discs- they are probably only about 20 bucks a piece. Great show, you won't refret it.

Sunday morning I went in and taught Sunday School and then headed home to do some thigns before the football games came on. Again my picks were less than stellar. Just horrible. This is why I would be horrible at betting on things. Nothing ever goes right for me.

After the games I headed to bed and sit here now at work looking for the weekend, or at least quitting time for today.
- posted by Brian @ 1/19/2009 10:33:00 AM

 
The Post with my NFL Conference Championship Picks
So last week was not very good at all. I went 0-4 in my picks. I should've went 2-2 but I outsmarted myself. See on Sunday I figured one of the road teams would win. Initially I said the Eagles and went with the Steelers at home. But then I convinced myself the Chargers could pull it out which meant changing the early game pick. I did, and both blew up in my face.

I'd be upset with myself but then I remembered that Cris Carter on ESPN went 0-4 the first weekend- and he gets paid to know football. I'm just a dummy with a blog.

That being said, let's try and regroup and hit at least 1 of these picks.

NFC Championship

Philadelphia Eagles at Arizona Cardinals

The last two times these teams played it was a blowout as the Cardinals seemed disinterested in the game. Arizona is a completely different team at home than on the road. At home they are 7-2 this year.

Couple keys here:

- Kurt Warner is great when you blitz him from the backside. He feels pressure well and is able to get the ball to his receiver. When you come at him from the front side he tends to hurry and force passes. The Eagles did this last week to Eli Manning and it was a pivotal moment that led to the first touchdown. The Eagles will need to disguise blitzes and come at Warner from all over the defensive front.

- The Cardinals front 7 will need to get to McNabb. They were able to get at him in the first game a few times. More important though, they need to tackle him when they get to him. Last week the Giants struggled with this and McNabb was able to make plays downfield.

- The turnover battle will be huge. The Cardinals have been getting quarterbacks to turn the ball over constantly this postseason. McNabb is not that type of quarterback though. He usually doesn't force passes and will tuck and run as opposed to trying to make something happen.

- Cover Larry Fitzgerald. When you know it is him that is going to beat you, and yuo still let him run free you are showing a bad scheme.

The Pick: Arizona has played extremely well during these playoffs. However, every match-up doesn't seem to favor them in this game. Something about the Eagles feels special too and their defense has been stifling. The offense will need to pick it up but I'll trust McNabb in the Arizona desert----Philadelphia wins


AFC Championship

Baltimore Ravens at Pittsburgh Steelers

It would seem like a real uphill climb for this Ravens team in this game. After all, they had only nine first downs against Tennessee in the divisional playoff round, and Flacco has gone just 20 for 45 in the two playoff games. Now the rookie will have to win a third straight post-season contest on the road, against a Pittsburgh team that ranks first in defense, having given up 300 yards to just one team on its entire schedule.

Let's admit that Baltimore got a little lucky against Tennessee - lucky that the obvious delay of game penalty was not called, which would have stalled a drive that led to the winning field goal. Baltimore has not only reaped the benefit of eight turnovers on the part of its opponents, but surely came away fortunate that rookie phenom running back Chris Johnson was bounced out early for the Titans. When you get only nine first downs, something extraordinary certainly has to go your way. In two games against Pittsburgh this season, both Baltimore losses, Flacco was nothing sensational, completing just 27 of 59 passes with a TD and two interceptions. There has been no 100-yard rusher against Pittsburgh all season, which would seem to thwart Baltimore's bread and butter; meanwhile, a healthier Willie Parker got it going against San Diego last week with 146 rushing yards.

On the surface, this matchup looks bad for Harbaugh's Ravens.

However, one thing that has been consistent all season is that this Baltimore squad's end product has always been greater than the sum of its parts. The running game does not produce huge numbers, averaging just four yards a carry, a full yard less than the Giants, yet the Ravens are able to chew clock, shorten games, and otherwise control matters more often than not. Flacco plays ugly, but seems to make a lot of clutch throws, and he has less of a burden because opponents must account for the run on almost every play. Pittsburgh's avoidance of 100-yard rushers would hardly seem a factor here, since the Ravens come with not one, not two, but THREE fresh running backs - LeRon McClain (902 yards), Willis McGahee (671) and Ray Rice (454 yards, and ready to play after a leg injury).

Also, it is hardly an accident that the Ravens have gotten all these takeaways; Baltimore's turnover ratio is +20 (Pittsburgh is +6). The Ravens have figured out a way to take things right down to the wire on both occasions they have played the Steelers, losing by three points in overtime at M&T Bank Stadium on September 29, then by a 13-9 margin on December 14, when Pittsburgh scored on that controversial TD by Santonio Holmes at the end. A very legitimate argument can be made that the Ravens could have won both those games. Maybe they match up well after all.

Pittsburgh's defense is awesome, but Baltimore's stop unit is comparable. It has shown a capacity to slow down the Pittsburgh running game, which had only 161 yards in the two meetings. Sure, Flacco is probably the guy more likely to make mistakes, but Cameron and Harbaugh have been industrious enough to work around his inexperience all year. Baltimore's defense, though, is perfectly capable of taking advantage of the Steeler offensive front, which has allowed Ben Roethlisberger to get sacked 47 times. With an opportunistic secondary, how many mistakes can that bring about?

The Pick: Here's where I'm torn here. If I were picking points I think I believe the Ravens can cover the +6. I don't know if they can actually win the game though....Ah what the hell----Baltimore wins
- posted by Brian @ 1/18/2009 08:45:00 AM

 
The Post with some bad parenting
There was a story in Blender this month that totally blew my mind.

This kid (14 I think) is a huge Guitar Hero fan. They estimate he plays it 10-12 hours a day. Apparently he wasn't doing well in school and he was consumed with the game.

So his parents did what any normal parents would do. They pulled him out of school, and are trying to help him build a life out of playing Guitar Hero. They found a high school online course that takes about 3 hours a day and then he plays the video game until he goes to bed at night.

They are looking to get to a point where the kid makes a living on being a Guitar Hero expert. So far, he has won a 2500 dollar cash prize and a year's supply of fast food from some contest.

The dad took some heat for this and said in an inteview, "I'm a coach and I always tell my kids to follow their dreams. I realized I wasn't doing the same for my kid." That's all well and good but it doesn't change the fact that you're a dumbass.

Yes there is a guy who is like a Halo master and makes some decent coin but he is the exception to the rule. You are basically stunting your child's fundamental growth at an early age and dooming him to a life where there is no hope beyond the game. We all know that the video game industry is constantly changing. At some point Guitar Hero will die out and then this kid is stuck. He will have no skill, and will be socially inept. Already he had a girlfriend who broke up with him because all he wanted to do was play the game. Not healthy at all.

If you're kid wanted to go into acting or singing then maybe--MAYBE-- I could understand pulling them out of school to follow their dreams. Becoming a lifetime video game player is not a dream. Tell the kid to stick it out through school and let him play the game on weekends and in free time like most kids. It at least gives him a chance for a normal life instead of slamming the door on him at such a young age.

People are stupid man.
- posted by Brian @ 1/14/2009 01:57:00 PM

 
The post with my weekend
Had a pretty good weekend so let's recap.

Friday I went to the gym which was a little busier than normal on a Friday night. They are starting a new course (Bodyflow or some such nonsense) and it was a warm-up class of it before the big grand debut on Saturday. Got some work in and did some things before heading home and getting a shower.

Went to 80's night which was better than most months. I tried to use my newfound confidence and it went ok. Didn't lead to anything but it was nice to be trying again. Also in another note- I've put my friend on possible Bro Code violation probation. I need the advice of the council of elders on this issue. I'm not of the authority to issue such a warning. My power on the council only goes so far. So that's why the warning is for a possible violation.

That's all we need to know.

Went to Wal-Mart afterwards before heading home. Yes I realize that a special kind of weirdo shops at Wal-Mart at 2 am in the morning, but let me tell you, it is so much nicer grocery shopping when there are not idiots all over the place blocking up aisles.

Headed home then and crawled into bed.

Saturday I got up and had to run out to the bank to cash a check I got from my Wage Works card. I spent roughly 500 dollars in 2 months on this card buying medicene and all kinds of other nonsense. My contacts were why I was getting cash back.

Came home and did some things around the house while it snowed. Once it let up for a little bit I shoveled the sidewalk and part of the driveway.

After that I came in and got ready so we could head out to the comedy show. For Christmas I got mom, dad, and I tickets to go see the Last Comic Standing tour back in Easton at the State Theater. With the weather we had a bit of a drive in front of us.

We stopped in Emmaus at Pickles Steakhouse for dinner which was really good. I had a Bourbon Glazed steak with a baked potato and steamed veggies- good stuff. Saw a majority of the first half and part of the third quarter of the Tennessee-Baltimore game while we ate. Place was pretty empty which was most likely the weather. Most notable thing was this chick walked in with her boyfriend and she was absolutely gorgeous. One of the better looking regular women I've ever seen in my life. Plus if you're like me- she was fairly well endowed. And no her gorgeousness was not affected by that aspect. It was just an added bonus.

Anywho....

Got back to the theater around 7:20 which meant we had to kill a little bit of time before the show started. Weirdly enough we saw a family we know who live roughly 5 minutes from us there. Small world.

Show got started a little after 8 and it was pretty good. It was the top 5 finalists of the past season and they all did approximately 25 minutes of material. Louis Ramey probably did a little more because he was the emcee for the evening and he did bits between each act . Highlights:

Louis Ramey started off solid. He did a huge bit on sex toys and masturbation that was hilarious. He also did a bit on going hunting in Louisana. He said that when he found out about the wearing orange the one hunter made it sound like deer can't see orange. He then suggested dressing in an all oragne outfit but then said a black man running in an orange jumpsuit in the woods of Louisana is not a really good idea.

After his act he brought out Jim Tavare who is British and has a really dry sense of humor. He also plays the bass which he incorporates into his act. There was a couple in front of us where the boyfriend had to explain approximately 60% of the jokes to her. How he put up with that is beyond me? Good for me. Girl was cute so I can see why he puts up with it, but at some point you need to think to yourself, "Enough is enough." This was highlighted during Tavare's set. He was doing some stuff with the bass and then said, "I'm now going to put the bass down for a minute. You are a useless piece of plywood." The girl had no idea what any of this meant. It was endearing I guess.

Jeff Dye was out next and he is really good. Maybe the best of the night. He was talking about Coors and said how it is the worst tasting beer. "They try and do all these tricks to make you forgt the taste.--We have the coldest beer, we're from the Rockies." "Hey Coors, I have a refrigerator and I can manipulate the temperature in that to make my beer as cold as I want it."

At the end of his set- just before intermission- he talked about how he would be selling DVD's in the lobby and his one rule was he won't sell to pedophiles. Other comics would but his policy is just keep walking pedophiles. So if you walked rgiht past him without buying a DVD he would know your a pedophile and understand.

They had a short intermission and then they went back into the show.

Marcus was out next and he's great. He's sort of like Dane Cook but funny. He has the same type of energy and everything about him screams rock star. He's also great at doing impressions which he showcased by imagining a Passion of the Christ remake with Adam Sandler. He also kept making fun of the old couple in the balcony saying they were making him feel like he was on The Muppet Show- he then did a great impression of Statler and Waldorf.

Last was Iliza Schlesinger who won the competition. She was fine but the crowd was kind of dying and there were scattered people leaving early becasue of the weather. She did some of the same material from the show and like I said was fine. I find her funnier than most female comedians though FWIW. She did a great bit making fun of Shark Week.

They closed the show around 10:40 and til we left the parking garage it was around 11:00. We made good time going home though and got in a little after midnight.

Sunday I went into Sunday School and did my duties there and then came home and watched football. My picks took a massive hit this past weekend and I suck badly right now at that.

Last night then I watched the premiere of 24 and headed off to bed.
- posted by Brian @ 1/12/2009 12:38:00 PM

 
The Post with this week's NFL Playoff Picks
I went 3-1 last weekend which helped my record to a mark of 157-103. There are at this moment 7 games left in the year. Last year I went 164-103 after careful reevalution of the records from last year. That means I need to go 7-0 the rest of the way to pull off tying my record from last year. I doubt it happens but who knows.

So as we head into rematch weekend- all these teams played each other in the regular season- let's give it a shot and try to match last year's record.

Baltimore at Tennessee-

Tenessee's Key- Protect the football. The Ravens are ballhawks, which they proved again last week in Miami. They love to crash your line and make you make mistakes. Kerry Collins will be huge in this game as he needs to protect the ball so the Ravens don't get extra possessions.

Baltimore's Key- Joe Flacco is going to make plays. Last week the rookie from Delaware left a lot of plays out on the field. Because of that a game that should've been a blowout was close until the very end. Tennessee's defense is much stronger than the Dolphins and they will pressure Flacco. If he makes a mistake the Titans will make him pay.

The Pick- The Tennessee Titans won the previous meeting 13-10 when they engineered two late scoring drives to knock off the Ravens. They feature a tough 1-2 punch at running back in Chris Johnson and LenDale White which will be a challenge for the Ravens. Baltimore has a decent running game as well and feature a smothering defense. Both teams are close on the defensive end though and that usually means which team makes the least mistakes wins. I'll take Kerry Collins in that department---Tennessee wins

Arizona at Carolina-

Carolina's Key- They need to test the Cardinals run defense early and often. Last week the Cardinals did a great job stopping the Falcons and Michael Turner. This is a much different running attack with the 1-2 punch of Jonathan Stewart and DeAngelo Williams. Make the Cardinals prove they can stop the running game again. If they can't then you control the clock and the game.

Arizona's Key- Steve Breaston will need to have a big game in the probable abscence of Anquan Boldin. In the previous game between these two (won by Carolina) the Cardinals found a ton of formation space for Larry Fitzgerald. Boldin draws a lot of attention though and he probably won't play. If Boldin is out and Breaston can't make plays than the Panthers will focus on stopping Fitzgerald and that will ruin the passing game of the Cardinals.

The Pick- In a season where the home team has been unreliable, Carolina has been the only steady force going 8-0. They won the previous meeting as well. The Cardinals had two glaring weaknesses coming into the post-season: their running game and their running defense. Last week they were great in both aspects but was that reality or an aberration? I'm guessing the latter----Carolina wins

Philadelphia at New York

New York's Key- A receiver has to step up and help out the offense. In the last meeting between these two Plaxico Burress was out and the Eagles played 8 guys in the box to shut down Earth, Wind, & Fire. The Giants had a deep pass dropped by Domenik Hixon that was a sure touchdown. The Giants have been mixing in Steve Smith and Mario Manningham to try and find a combo that works. If they can't come up in this game than the Eagles will be able to stuff the run and eat them up.

Philadelphia's Key- Another weapon will need to help out Brian Westbrook. Last time these two played Westbrook was all over the field. The Giants won't allow that to happen again and they will key on him. That means someone- Kevin Curtis, Brent Celek, Jason Avant, Correll Buckhalter, whoever- will need to be a viable option to draw attention away from Westbrook.

The Pick- These two teams know each other extremely well. They've played twice this year with each team winning on the other's turf. Giants 36-31 in Philly. Eagles 20-14 in New York. That means 51-50 points wise. The Eagles defense has been on fire of late and they will be geared up for this game. The Giants have struggled some in their front four in the last few games and they will need to get pressure. This pick is sort of reluctant because I think it is a toss-up-----New York wins

San Diego at Pittsburgh

Pittsburgh's Key- They need to finish scoring drives. Last time these teams played they could only manage 3 field goals en route to a goofy 11-10 win. They won't get away with that this week. They have almost no running game and Big Ben could be more hurt than he is letting on. Last time he trew all over the field against the Chargers and still only managed 9 points. The Chargers defense is better since that meeting.

San Diego's Key- Keep the field position battle in their favor. Last week Mike Scifres had maybe the greatest game ever by a punter in NFL history. He dropped all 6 of his punts inside the 20 including the one at the end that hit at the 2 and then took a left turn out of bounds. The Steelers are an attack defense and they like to shorten the field for their offense. In what might be wintry conditions the field position battle could be huge. They will need to get a first down or two on every drive to keep the field position in their favor.

The Pick- Tough game to pick and a great way to cap off the weekend. These are different teams since their last meeting. The Chargers have been rolling as of late, and the Steelers have come back to the pack a little more. This is another toss-up game for me and I'm trying really hard not to favor my team. So reluctantly the day of upsets continues-----San Diego wins
- posted by Brian @ 1/10/2009 09:40:00 AM

 
The Post with me being The Bachelor
I've decided I want to be on The Bachelor. I think the time has come for an overweight bachelor. It would be awesome.

Now the question is: How can I make this happen? We need a plan. We also need to address the positives and negatives of ABC puttign me in the driver's seat.

Couple negative against me:

- I don't have a great job that pays me a ton of money.

I've seen the show I know this matters some. Plus it would be hard to get a bunch of the model looking women they get to do the show at that point, and I don't want any really ugly looking women. But whatever- true love and all that nonsense right? (Yes I know there was a bass fisherman at one point but I assume he makes good money)

- I'm not really photogenic.

The old saying is the camera adds 10 pounds. I've already got an extra ten (or more, shut up) pounds so I can't really afford to add a bunch more. I do look good in a suit though.

Also, I've come to the conclusion that my nose looks huge when filmed from the side.

- I'm not really suave.

I can be. Every now and again I hit on something that works and later look back at it and think, "Why the hell can't you be like that all the time?" Most times though, I have a really awkward nature towards women. Basically I think too much about what I'm saying and I analyze what I say as I'm saying it which leads me to say dumb things. On TV in front of millions of people I can only see this scenario being exacerbated. But it could be one of the few times where I surprise myself. However, over the course of a bunch of weeks I'd imagine my awkwardness will come through at least once.

The main downside to these three is that the women are free to leave the show at any point. If the women just all asked off the show after the initial meeting that would be embarassing. But how much better would that make the show. 10 minutes in and it's just me and there are begging women to stay. "Look, we'll put you on a real season if you hang with it. We swear. You don't even have to date the guy."

Now some positives:

- It would help me out.

It's a purely selfish reason, but it's a good one. All of the Bachelor's that have been on really should have no problem finding women. Does Jesse Palmer, former NFL quarterback and current ESPN college football analyst, really need help finding a woman? I think Jerry Connolloy's brother was on the show at one point too.Please man. The show should've been called, "Help a dude bang some chick he could get on his own if he saw her at the local bar." Look at some of these other jobs- vice president of a chain of banks, doctor, global finacier. Do these guys really need help?

- It would be good television and a good story

I have a pretty good personality so I'd be fine in the actual spirit of the show. I can be pretty charming when I set my mind to it, rather than being the guy who is just trying to lighten the mood at all times. So other than the looks department I know I could handle the TV show. (By looks I mean- it's not like I'm a 9 or a 10. I'm like a 6 or 7 though. Not many times do you see 6's on these shows though.) The good story would come because I'd actually be interested in meeting the girls and getting to know them to make a fair choice which leads to...

- Everyone would have a chance

I wouldn't necessarily discriminate against any of the women in front of me. A girl with a good personality on there would definitely go far on the show with me at the helm. Granted I don't want any women that look like the offspring of the Blob and Seabiscuit on there, but for the most part I would give them all a chance. Plus it'd be awesome to at least ruin one girl's image of herself on that show. Some bleach blonde girl who gets by solely on looks getting told by some shlubby guy, "Meh. You get no rose." would be awesome- if only to hear her lose sanity in the confessional.

I really think we can work this out and start a new trend. Maybe it's not the Bachelor. Maybe we need to bring back Average Joe or whatever that show was called on NBC. Let's get this ball rolling people, and in the near future you will hear,

"And a new season of The Bachelor with Brian Hansley." It would be cool.
- posted by Brian @ 1/07/2009 02:23:00 PM

 
The Post with me looking at a financial breakdown
I mentioned some time ago in the blog about how hilarious -and stupid- the Sound Off section is in the local paper. For those that don't know what it is a breif description. The Pottstown Mercury (barely a paper in the first place) has established a phone line that is there solely for people to call in and bitch about things. Some of the things are fine, legitimate complaints- but that is maybe 2% of what they print in the section. The other 98% are just stupid people nitpicking, or just complaining to hear their own voice. I can imagine people calling into this phone line and getting animated bitching about something. (And really how great can the job be of the person who has to come in at 8 am and listen to a bunch of messages that are nothing but people yelling about inane things.? I think if you're looking for the next person to go on a killing spree they have to be prime suspect #1.)

There have been two discussions dominating the past few weeks. One is involving the new recycling bins the borough of Pottstown has issued. There were complaints about people overfilling bins and stuff spilling into the streets and recycling personnel refusing to pick up overfull bins. So Pottstown had new bins made which are bigger. Problem solved right? No. See there is a new issue that has people all fired up now with these bins. That issue? They are blue, and thus eye sores. Apparently more of an eye sore than plastic bottles just littering the street. What do I know?

That's not the discussion that kind of bothered me though.

The other main topic in this section is about unions and whether or not they are killing jobs and businesses in America. Some people are, or were, in unions and argue that unions get fair wages for workers and protect them from employers. Others argue that unions get inflated rates for workers and if a company can move plants overseas and pay 50-75% less for manual labor it's no wonder they do that. They argue that the chasm between what unions get workers and what employers want to pay is so great that a company almost has to move overseas. (FWIW- I tend to agree with the latter group of people on the whole, but there are many more factors that make it attractive for a company to move overseas. These arguers are kind of over-simplfying the issue- it's akin to saying the Civil War was about slavery.)

One particular line of argument though was incredibly insane. Someone made a comment about the pay scale for union workers and how they make way too much money. The next day called in and said, "No we don't." (Yes this is what now passes for discourse in the print media. It's no wonder that newspapers are a dying breed).

This went on for a few days before someone wrote in with this gem: "To the idiot who called in and complained about the Union getting a wage of 28....." That was where I stopped reading the sentence.

28 dollars an hour is not a lot of money to raise a family on? Let's do some math here:

28 x 40 = 1120 dollars per week

1120 X 52 = 58,240 dollars per year- that's obviously gross pay.

Now let's assume that with taxes and your union dues (including them here becasue I don't know how much to take out monthly) you are losing 19, 240 dollars. That means- after the 33% deduction (probably a little high) you are down to 39,000 dollars a year.

39,000 / 52 = 750 dollars per week of take home. That would give you between 3,000 and 3,750 per month to "spend"- obviously depending on whether it's a 4 or 5 week month.

Now let's assume you live in a house that all told will run you 275,000. If you get a 20 year loan you are looking at 1145 per month on a mortgage payment. If you have a 30 year loan you are looking at 763 per month on a mortgage.

Now let's say you have a 40,000 dollar truck and a 20,000 dollar car. Both are put at a 6 year loan. That means you have 833 per month in spending on those vehicles

If you have a 20 year home loan we are at 1978 of spending per month. 30 year loan you are at 1596 per month. Now let's say you spend 700 dollars a month in groceries. You are now looking at either 2678 or 2296 depending on your home loan.

Yes I realize that after that we have water, heating, electric, etc. bills. So the 300-1500 dollars of cash might not cover expenses greatly. It also may mean you don't get to do a bunch of things or buy everything you want. However- there is the possibility of a second income in the house. Let's assume that person makes even only 15,000 per year take home. That gives you another ~1153-1453 a month. If the spouse doesn't have a job it does makes things tighter but it means you need to be a little better about your spending.

Look, I'm not a home owner and I realize it's easy to sit on the sidelines and critique people. I have a problem though with people who cry poverty when they are making a decent amount of cash. Between 4,000 and 5,000 a month take home is enough to raise a family even if you have to make a few cutbacks here and there. If you're spending within your means and still having problems that is one thing. If you are making approx 4500 a month take home and still having problems there are different issues at work. (There are exceptions to every rule.)
- posted by Brian @ 1/06/2009 01:45:00 PM

 
The Post with my weekend
The first weekend of 2009 is in the books and it looks surprisingly similar to the weekends of 2008. Somewhat anyway.

Friday I had to work which sucked because we were as slow as could be. Basically our company decided to give people the New Year's Eve holiday on Wednesday with no option of flexing it to Friday. Most other companies let people flex that day. So that means Wednesday we were short staffed and swamped with work. Friday we were overstaffed with no work to do. Super! I love this stupid ass company so much. I absolutely can't wait until I have another job and can leave this place in my rear view.

So after work I headed home because my movie didn't start til 8 and I didn't want to spend money anywhere. Took a shower and did some things before heading to see The Day the Earth Stood Still. I guess I wasn't expecting it to be good, and it wasn't. TDTESS is one of my favorite films and I was kind of interested to see how they would look to ruin it. Basically they had Keanu Reeves talking in a monotone voice the whole time (awesome). Take one of the creepiest set pieces of the original film- the spaceship landing in the day casting a shadow everywhere- and set it at night (double awesome). Then they give some really good actors nothing to do (triple awesome). This all leads to a visually nice looking, but all together boring feature film.

After that I headed over to see Bedtime Stories which was fine. Not great, but not terrible. It's a Disney film with Adam Sandler which seems like an odd mix but they balanced the two fairly well. It's not any new lesson but it's a pretty fast moving film.

After the movies I headed over to Jen's house to hang out with Jen, Rachel, Julie, and Jess again. It was fun as we just sat and talked for a little.

Saturday morning I got up and headed for the gym. It was my last day of the gym before the place will be full for the next couple weeks. So I needed to make this one count. Got in a good hour mixing some treadmill and weightlifting work. After that I ran into Wal-Mart and grabbed some dinner for that evening.

I made myself dinner and watched the first half of the Arizona-Atlanta game. At halftime I did my fire cleanse where I burned all the old memories of women past. It wasn't easy to throw some of my things on that fire but I did it. I had a little over a half a trash bag full of stuff. I thought it would be more, but a lot of it was old pictures and letters and little notes. There were a few CD's and a shirt as well (I never really listened to that Eagle Eye Cherry CD anyway) It sounds silly but I gotta tell you it really feels liberating. It's gonna propel me to where I'm going. I tell ya that much.

So after that I came back in and watched the second half of the game. I then headed out to the O's with Joel to watch my Chargers play the Colts. I also became a member out there. More importantly though the Bolts won which was awesome. Watched some of the Flyers game then before heading home for the night.

Sunday we did the freaking Jesus village again which is good because I didn't have to actually do anything, but it's hard to keep people interested that many times.

Came home after that and did some work throwing away more tapes. Basically I have to dump a few things voer to DVD's so I can get rid of them. After that I watched the football games and the SNL Sports Extra sepcial. Then I did a few more little things and settled into bed.

Now here I am writing this.
- posted by Brian @ 1/05/2009 02:21:00 PM

 
The Post with my NFL Wild Card picks
It is Wild Card Round of the playoffs weekend. I much like the Charges, Colts, and Falcons enter on a bit of a roll. I of course have it easier than the Chargers and Colts since one of them will not get past this weekend. I will- for better or worse. Lately it's been better. After being completly awful middle of the season I recovered in the last couple weeks and at least set myself up to have a semi-respectable record picks wise although it will be below last season's total. So let's get to the games and try to have a successful first round of the playoffs.

Interesting thing about thsi coming weekend is that all four road teams are favored which would fit the theme of home teams being unable to defend their turf.

Atlanta at Arizona- Arizona has their first playoff game in a long time and they welcome in the best story in the playoffs this season. Should be a great game. The hard part about picking this game is that Arizona is a completely different team at home than on the road. They just seem more uncomfortable and don't make as many mistakes. On the flip side they seem to only play the NFC West well. They were 6-0 in division this year, and 3-7 ourside division. That doesn't bode well.

Arizona's key- They need to find some kind of ground game. You can't throw the ball 35-45 times and expect to win in the playoffs. It just doesn't work that way. They have just been unable to get anything going with either Edgerrin James or Tim Hightower. Kurt Warner is fine, but if you rely on him too much he will crumble.

Atlanta's key- Hammer the Cardinals with the run. Arizona has a big play offense so you need to keep them off the field for long stretches at a tiem. If you can do that it will break their rhythm and they won't be able to get going offensively. Michael Turner is second in the league in rushing and he will get a steady stream of carries throughout here.

The Pick- Arizona has been on crusie control since Thanksgiving and have looked awful when they've had to play teams that have mattered. Atlanta has beaten Minnesota and Tampa Bay in the past few weeks in must win games for them. I think it will be too hard for Arizona to turn the jets back on. Atlanta wins.


Indianapolis at San Diego- A rematch from a weeks ago, and from the second round of last year's AFC playoffs. The Colts got off to a bad start and then rattled off 9 straight wins to get themselves into the playoffs. The Chargers were 4-8 a month ago and everyone was planning on next year and calling for Norv Turner's head. The Broncos then collapsed badly and the Chargers won out to sneak into the playoffs. Both quarterbacks were great this year with Peyton getting MVP consideration and Rivers flying under the radar with a great touchdown to interception ratio. Also, the sting of last year's loss will be with the Colts (who did beat the Chargers earlier in the year.)

San Diego's key- The defense (especially the secondary) was maligned through most of the year. Once Ron Rivera came in as defensive coordinator they got better and by the last few games they were shutting down some good receivers. They will need to be up to the challenge here as Peyton carved them up earlier in the season. If the secondary can hold and take away Peyton's options it will mean a long day for the Colts offense.

Indianapolis's key- The offensive line must keep pressure off Peyton. There is some inexperience on that offensive line so you have to assume the Chargers will blitz and try to play the line into making the wrong reads. If the line can keep the pressure at bay then Peyton will have enough time for receivers to work open and he will find them. It would be a recipe for disaster for the Chargers.

The Pick- I think we get a shootout which would normally favor Peyton but I like the ability of Rivers to not turn the football over. If LT is healthy enough to give them some carries and they use Sproles effectively this is a good win for them. San Diego wins

Baltimore at Miami- Another rematch from earlier in the season as the two most unlikely playoff teams meet. Chad Pennington was cast out of New York to make way for Brett Favre and had a great season down in Miami. The Dolphins had one of the best one season turn-arounds ever after going 1-15 last year. The Ravens have had some great defensive play (per usual) but are getting some really excellent play from young quarterback Joe Flacco which is what is helping them. They've almost turned into an offensive juggernaut.

Miami's key- Chad Pennington is going to have to win this game for the Dolphins. The Wildcat offense that they made so effective this year bombed big time when they used it against the Ravens. Baltimore is way to physical and they don't attack the ball carrier, they attack the scheme. Ray Lewis, Terrell Suggs, and Ed Reed are too fast and too physical for gimmick plays to work against them. That means Pennington will need to be smart with the football. If he starts turning the ball over this will be a long day for the Dolphins.

Baltimore's key- Get Joe Flacco comfortable so he can find some kind of rhythm offensively. That might mean relying on the running game for a while at the beginning. Flacco is a good quarterback but may be prone to jitters at the start. If he makes some mistakes they could get down early and be playing catch-up. Stick with teh run early, and give Flacco some easy reads to start.

The Pick- This could be a really good game. I just think the Ravens defense will be too good for the Dolphin defense and will stifle what Miami wants to do. Cam Cameron, the Ravens offensive coordinator, will look to run his old team into the ground and it can happen because the Dolphins are a little undersized up front. Baltimore wins.

Philadelphia at Minnesota- This to me is the blowout game of the weekend. I can see all the other games being in doubt somewhere in the 4th quarter. I think this one is over, somewhere in the 3rd, maybe by the half. The Vikings did get in the playoffs but they don't feel like a team who truly belongs there. They have a great run defense but still struggle against the pass. They also have a relatively inexperienced quarterback and a running back who is showing a propensity for putting the ball on the turf. This could get ugly early.

Minnesota's key- Get better defensively against the pass. Teams know it is difficult to run on the Vikings so they go to the pass. That is right up Andy Reid's alley. The Eagles have a bunch of good playmakers at receiver so the Vikings will need to rise to that challenge or this will be a long day.

Philadelphia's key- How much will Jim Johnson attack Tavaris Jackson with the blitz? You know he will bring multiple blitz packages and schemes into the game and they will look to get pressure on Jackson. If they do that it will force some tunrovers and they can turn this into a rout quickly.

The Pick- I just think every match-up in the game favors the Eagles which makes it hard to pick against them. Philadelphia wins.
- posted by Brian @ 1/02/2009 11:24:00 AM

 
The Post with my New Year's stuff
Went to a party last night and had a great time with the usual gang. We ate a bunch of food and drank a bunch of alcohol. I drank a few shots of Aftershock before I knew I was going to get sick if I drank anymore of it. We left around 2 or 2:30 so it was a long night.

We rocked the Nintendo Wii all night with Mario Kart getting a healthy dose of playing time. Man I used to love Mario Kart on the old N64 system. Spent hours of days playing that game. The new one is even better with the wheels and everything. We also played American Idol: Karaoke Revolution for a while and our group took turns going through the competition and we won the title. So that was nice.

So onto 2009 and where do we go from here? I know people make resolutions and I've done that before but I look at it as something to make me depressed with myself later in the year when I realize I have no chance of accomplishing these things.

So this year we are not really settting goals (except for one) but more things we just want to do in the coming year.

I'm in a constant battle to drop weight. I've dropped weight in the past 18 months but I can still do more. I'm not going to obsess over it though. If I keep jogging and doing my weightlifting I may not lose weight but I'll keep getting myself healthy and that is what's most important.

I'd like to find a woman but why press for it. I've got some momentum going in my favor right now so we'll just let it take me where it wants to. I do know I'm going to try and do what I can to speed up the process by releasing the rest of my demons. Saturday I'm having me a good old burning to get rid of everything I've ever held onto from girls in my past. Cards, letters, notes, cds, whatever- it all gonna be ashes come Saturday night.

Then I need to make more time for friends this year. I did a better job this past year but I can do even better still. That is on the horizon.

My main goal for this year though is finding me a new job so I can leave behind the company that doesn't appreciate what I bring to the table. It will be awesome once I know I don't have to walk into that place any more to work.

That's about it. Have a great New Year people- wish you all nothing but the best
- posted by Brian @ 1/01/2009 03:23:00 PM